Saturday, January 21, 2012

You might be an old fart if...

* You keep people's names, phone numbers, and addresses in a Rolodex

* You use a paper engagement calendar

* You still pay bills using checks

* You listen to music on a turntable (or a CD player)

* Your camera requires film

* Your phone has a cord, which curls

* You have used the phrases "Kids these days!" or "Back when I was a kid/growing up..." in the last 72 hours

* Drinking alcohol gives you an immediate headache

* You fall asleep before your kids

* You prefer your movies in 2D

* Your idea of "doing drugs" involves taking two Aleve (or antacids or heartburn medicine)

* You quote lines from The Flintstones and/or The Brady Bunch (or pick your 1960s or 1970s sitcom)

* Your email address contains the letters "aol"

* You still refer to Russia as The Soviet Union

* You own a leisure suit

* When it snows your first thought is "my back already hurts at thought of shoveling all that"


Betty Cracker said...

When shopping for food, I choose which grocery line to fall into by avoiding lines containing oldsters because I know they'll maximize the delay by rummaging through their Samsonite-sized handbags for a check book, writing the check in slow-mo and then notating the amount in that antiquated little ledger thingie, etc. The other day, I was flummoxed by a 30-something woman who HAULED OUT A CHECKBOOK! It was like I fell through a wormhole to 1992 or something. Very disturbing.

Anonymous said...

What a depressing realization for myself!!

J. said...

Hi, I'm J., and I am an old fart. (And there ain't no way I'm giving up my Rolodex or my weekly engagement calendar.)

Now you kids get off my lawn!

AlyssaGoodman said...

I failed!!! Yay!!!

J. said...

@Alyssa, I'll let you know when I publish my post "You might be a cutting-edge astrophysicist if..." (Of course, it would be more amusing if you were a rocket scientist, but...)

Another David S. said...

That's okay. At least we old farts will know how to survive when the satellites go down--and all those paper records will come in *very* handy. ;-)

Ange said...

Yup. Ticked a few boxes there. :-/

Sugar Daze said...

Thanks for confirming what I have long suspected as the truth -- I am an indeed an old fart!

larissa said...

Yabba dabba do
No one is alone in this
We are all old farts

Terry David said...

Actually, it's today's old farts who gave up their turntables about 25 years ago.

And it's only the old farts who are completely unaware that Kids These Days! have revived the LP format!

True about the CDs tho.

Now, let's see. Rolodex, check. Check book, check. . . I think I'll just Stifle Myself now.