Merry Christmas Music

Forget "Silent Night" and "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen." These five J-TWO-O hand-selected Christmas songs will bring you true comfort and joy.

First up: Alvin and the Chipmunks singing that Christmas classic "Christmas Don't Be Late" (aka "I just want a hula hoop"):



[And yes, J-THREE-O and I will be seeing Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel at some point over Christmas break. Oh joy.]

And speaking of animals (or singing animals), these kitties wish you a very meowry Christmas...



[Ahnt dey cuuuute?!]

as do these cute wittle puppies...



And speaking of howlers, if you have not checked out the literal version of Hall & Oates' "Jingle Bell Rock," here's what you've been missing:



[H/T to Rumproast]

Finally, it just would not be Christmas (to those of us of a certain age) without the "Snow Miser Song" and the "Heat Miser Song," from The Year Without a Santa Claus (the original one):



(Had enough? Be thankful I spared you The Jonas Brothers singing "Feliz Navidad.")

Wishing you a very merry Christmas...

How The New York Times Stole Christmas

Leave it to the elitist Liberal Grinches over at The New York Times to destroy Christmas for millions of children.

It's a good thing Virginia wrote that letter to the editors at the New York Sun.

So what's next, New York Times editors? You going to tell us there is no such thing as the Easter Bunny? (Before you do that: Think of all the poor little Peeps and Creme Eggs that would go to waste!) Or that the Tooth Fairy is just a myth? (You are not going to tell me all those teeth just disappeared with no help, are you? And where did all that money come from, Bernie Madoff?)

But that all pales -- pales, I say -- compared to corralling a bunch of supposed "experts" to instruct parents how to explain to their innocent, sweet children that there is no Santa Claus just days before Christmas. For shame, New York Times editors, for shame.

Clearly, somebody got a big lump of coal for Christmas last year.

Anyone know the name of a good exorcist?

I'd like to think I'm not a superstitious person (she said, clutching her lucky rabbit's foot), but I'm starting to think our house may be haunted.

First, our garage door started mysteriously going up on its own, after both the spouse and/or I saw it shut.

Then the spouse mysteriously found himself locked in the garage. (I swear I had nothing to do with it.)

Then my car mysteriously died in same garage -- and every time I put the key in in the ignition to try to start it the headlights maniacally flashed, the wipers started wiping, and the radio blared, even though all those things were off (or had been when I last turned off the car).

Then this morning the stool I was sitting on in the kitchen mysteriously tipped over, sending Felix (my black cat, who was on my lap at the time) and me flying -- with Felix gripping me with his claws for dear life. (Let my just say "Ouch" doesn't begin to cover it.)

I think there can be only one explanation for these mysterious goings on: Poltergeist.

So if any of you knows of a method for safely removing poltergeist or the name of a good exorcist, please let me know. Soon. Before something really bad happens.

Sweet!

Behold the World's Best Blondies (made from scratch with dark chocolate chips and mini M&Ms)!

















Zoom in on the blondies!


















And my* fabulous Dark-Chocolate-Kissed Ginger Cookies...

















In a word: Deeeeelicious!

I just hope J-THREE-O's teachers (all 11 of them) enjoy eating them as much as we* enjoyed making them, from scratch, all day, after one of us shoveled snow and broke yet another nail and nearly burned her hand.

*Technically "our" as J-THREE-O shared measuring, mixing, and baking duties with me -- but, alas, not clean up. :-(

Football, beer, and dogs. Does it get any better than this?

No wonder they call dogs "man's best friend." Not only can he help you crack open a nice cold beer*...

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he's the perfect tailgate companion...



And speaking of beer and football and tailgating, enterprising 21-year-old inventor, football fan, and beer drinker Dan Klavoon, from Lockport, New York, this week won the Bud Light "Tailgate Tested, Tailgate Approved" contest (a free trip to the 2010 Super Bowl) with his must-have tailgating invention the Beer Sphere. (It's a football! It's a beer chiller! It's the Beer Sphere!)



Of course, as both my teams -- the New Jersey Giants and New Jersey Jets -- have practically no chance of making the playoffs this year, and I don't have a dog (except when it comes to the sports teams I root for), and I have not gotten so lazy that I cannot simply get up and get the spouse a beer, I do not (currently) have use for any of these marvelous products. But they make great stocking stuffers! Order yours today!

*I love how Bark4Beer calls its product "The Best Dog Collar Bottle Opener," so you won't confuse it with all those other dog collar bottle openers.

Al Franken for President

Finally, someone had the cojones to tell Connecticut Senator Joseph Lieberman to shut the f@ck up.



That alone, IMHO, makes Senator Al Franken (D-MN) presidential material. (Though I also enjoyed Senator Franken's recent verbal smackdown of Senator John Thune (R-SD) for not knowing -- or purposely misrepresenting -- key facts about the health care bill, as well as Franken's books Rush Limbaugh Is a Big Fat Idiot (and Other Observations) and Lies and the Lying Liars Who Tell Them: A Fair and Balanced Look at the Right.)

Sure, it takes way more than being quick with a quip, publishing a best-selling book, having a degree from an Ivy League school, and a Senate seat to be President -- oh wait. Never mind.

I therefore unofficially nominate Al Franken for President 2016, because he's good enough, he's smart enough, and, doggonit, people like him! (Well, some people.)

UPDATED: Here's a link to to the Al Franken - Joe Lieberman smackdown in the Senate yesterday with John McCain getting all uppity afterward.

('’)

Syncrhonized cat napping

What do you think? New Olympic sport?