If you give a kid a tablet...

You want to know why Americans today feel poorer than their parents? It's because there is so much more crap we feel compelled to buy, which is putting us in debt and/or making us feel poor.

Just think about the number of gadgets the average family (two adults, two kids) feels it is "necessary" to have these days -- vs. our parents' generation (for those of us over 35):

Now	Then
Satellite radio	Transistor radio (AM, FM)
A television in every room	A television in every home
Cable (or satellite or "phone company" TV)	Rabbit ears
Premium channels (HBO, Showtime, etc.)	ABC, NBC, CBS, PBS
DVR	Sh*t out of luck
Computers (typically two or more)	The library, an encyclopedia, a calculator (or pencil and paper)
Smart phones -- and texting and data plans	Party lines -- and yelling out the window
Wii/Xbox 360 + games	Stickball, riding your bike up and down the street
iPads	Drawing pads, board games

You add up all those things and that's thousands of dollars we are spending, each year. (The spouse and I did the math.) And all so we can, what? Watch the Super Bowl on a 60-inch plasma HDTV? Buy sh*t on eBay we don't really need? Play games at work? Drunk text semi-nude pictures of ourselves? Brag about where we are having dinner or are staying on vacation on Facebook?

And does your 3-year-old really need her own special kid-friendly $479 tablet?! (Apparently the people at VINCI think so.)

At some point, you gotta stop the madness -- or stop whining about how broke you are.

Btw, lest my Republican friends start reading me the riot act about free-market capitalism, I'm not advocating Communism, just a little (or a lot) less Consumerism.

That said, if one of you does have a 60-inch plasma HDTV and is planning on watching the Super Bowl on it, can we come over and watch with you?

Remind you of anyone?

Listen carefully, now. Sound familiar, ladies?



Just curious: Why is it we find a hairy, slightly rotund dormouse snoring cute but a hairy, slightly rotund guy snoring not so much?

[H/T CuteOverload]

That's a funny looking dog you got there, lady

As some of you know, I am a big fan of the blog Disapproving Rabbits. And this (short) video of the folks who run Disapproving Rabbits trying to harness train their new rabbit, Dougal, cracks me up every time I watch it.



I am also seriously impressed, having never seen a trained rabbit before. (Just try getting a cat to stand on its hind legs, or give you its paw, or wear a harness.)

The Early Deer Special

Oh deer. I knew we should have taken down the All You Can Eat Salad Bar sign....

D'oe!

















Deer family, party of three? Right this way.

(The third deer was grazing out of frame.)

















Would you like to see a fawn's menu?

No, that's okay. I'll just have what mom's having.

















Hey, don't like it? Don't eat it!

(Click on the photo below to get a closer view of Bambi here sticking out his/her tongue.)

















[Note: I took these shots on Friday (before it snowed) through our family room window, so as not to scare off the deer. Hence the slightly blurry/stripey/reflective quality of the photos.]

You might be an old fart if...

* You keep people's names, phone numbers, and addresses in a Rolodex

* You use a paper engagement calendar

* You still pay bills using checks

* You listen to music on a turntable (or a CD player)

* Your camera requires film

* Your phone has a cord, which curls

* You have used the phrases "Kids these days!" or "Back when I was a kid/growing up..." in the last 72 hours

* Drinking alcohol gives you an immediate headache

* You fall asleep before your kids

* You prefer your movies in 2D

* Your idea of "doing drugs" involves taking two Aleve (or antacids or heartburn medicine)

* You quote lines from The Flintstones and/or The Brady Bunch (or pick your 1960s or 1970s sitcom)

* Your email address contains the letters "aol"

* You still refer to Russia as The Soviet Union

* You own a leisure suit

* When it snows your first thought is "my back already hurts at thought of shoveling all that"

Would you pay $400K for this t-shirt?

That's K, as in $1,000. As in $400,000. You could buy a house with that. Or an Aston Martin V12 Vantage -- with enough leftover to buy a year's supply of regular t-shirts for you and your friends.

But J., you say, this t-shirt is made from 100% organic cotton!

Fie, I say. There are plenty of other t-shirts made from organic cotton that don't cost $400,000.

But J., you say, this t-shirt was made using only renewable energy sources (i.e., wind, solar) "and represents a C02 reduction of 90% compared to traditional t-shirt production."

That's very nice, I say, but $400,000... for a t-shirt?! Puh-lease.

But J., you say, the t-shirt has 16 diamonds, each weighing over a carat!

To which I would reply, well, that explains why it's the world's most expensive t-shirt, but WTF would anyone put 16 diamonds on a t-shirt?! Are you effing crazy? The first time you washed that sucker, at least one of those diamonds is going to come off -- and no way am I entrusting that baby to a dry cleaner. (Also, I bet it loses its shape in the wash and/or shrinks.)

But what really bugs me? For $400,000, you'd think they could have designed a more attractive, flattering t-shirt.

Btw, the t-shirt is for real -- and you can find out more about it, and order one, by clicking the link above.

On a related note, if this t-shirt had been around 26 years ago, do you think Paul Simon would have changed the name of the song to "Diamonds on the Front of her T"?

The heart of rock 'n' roll is still beating

I don't know why, but I've been thinking a lot about Huey Lewis (and the News) lately. (Midlife crisis/1980s nostalgia? Or perhaps it was seeing him on Hot in Cleveland the other day, if only for a minute.) Anyway, do you really need a reason to listen to Huey Lewis and the News?

[One of my favorite 1980s memories is going to see/hear Huey Lewis and the News in concert, outside, on the Miller High Life pier, one summer. I don't remember much about the concert as I probably had one Miller High Life too many, and I have a vague memory of having to go see a doctor the next day as I couldn't hear anything, having sat way too close to the speakers or something. Anyway...]

Following are video clips of some of my Huey Lewis and the News favorites (presented in no particular order).

First up, "I Want a New Drug." Words to live by.



Next up, "If This Is It."



[Seriously, what is with all the chicks in skimpy swimsuits in these videos? Though at least they don't look like they've had liposuction, breast enlargements, and Botox.]

And last, but in no way least, "The Heart of Rock & Roll."



[Sigh, remember when videos actually had something to do with the lyrics?]

So what was (or is) your favorite Huey Lewis and the News song?

On a (somewhat) related note, against my better judgement, I'm going to attempt to watch American Idol tonight. Here's hoping they finally "discover" an actual rock/pop star.