Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Things that suck

I firmly believe that a little kvetching is good for the soul -- and for preventing ulcers. (Seriously, would it kill you people to leave a comment once in a while? Would it?) So instead of just grumping to myself about all the things that currently suck, and there are a lot of things that suck right now (and I'm not just thinking about the Mets and Red Sox), I have composed the following short list of things that suck, which I encourage you to add to.

Herewith, J's list of Things that Suck (listed in no particular order):

* The Mets' bullpen

* Taxes

* Cancer

* Home repairs

* Vacuum cleaners

* Congress

* The weather

* Mondays

* People who say they are going to do something but don't

* Incompetent people (especially when they are your boss)

* Catty teenage girls

* Catty middle-aged women

* Pia Toscano getting voted off American Idol (even though she wasn't my favorite)

* The Boston Red Sox

* Waiting on line

* Waiting on line at the airport

* Waiting more than 10 minutes for a table at a restaurant when you have a reservation and the place is empty

* Waiting for days for people to call or email you back

[Can you tell I have a thing about waiting? Can you?]

* Vampires

* ATM fees

* Being charged for a supposedly free frequent flyer ticket

* Modern day news coverage

* Patronage (especially when I'm not the one benefiting; see also "Incompetent people")

* The price of movies

* Most of the movies today

Okay, I feel better now.

If I left something out, let me know via a Comment.


The Daily Del Franco said...

Okay, here goes:

A team that loses its best player right before the playoffs (NY Rangers Ryan Callahan)

Health care that doesn't aim to make people healthy


Rory McElroy on the back nine at the Masters (that would be people who suck but you get the point)

And speaking of people who suck: Charlie Sheen, who sleptwalk through a performance in Wallingford Saturday night. The people who paid for it did not win.

Dave S. said...

When I was at the absolute nadir of my (on hiatus) competitive fencing career, I ran across the Stupidity poster in the middle of a particularly bad competition. It resonated, in a really bad way.

Taxes in and of themselves do not suck, unless of course you don't mind building your own roads, checking your own food etc. "I like taxes, with them I buy civilization" - O.W. Holmes.

Verification word "suctat" as in "I suctat fencing that day I ran across the Stupidity poster."

Kendor said...

Add these... in no particular order, or indication of worldly importance

* Ridiculously excessive airline change fees (e.g. I just had to pay American Airlines $$ to reroute my return flight from San Diego which was to be to NYC to San Jose... 460 miles vs. 2,849 miles)

* Cell phone contracts that lock you into multiple years

* MLB baseball charging $14.95 a season to listen to baseball on the internet on your PC (not so bad), but another $14.95 a year to listen on your smartphone (and by all accounts its very flakey)

* Most good newer movies locked out NetFlix streaming service

Betty Cracker said...

Here's a few things that suck:

1) Breaking your right index finger whilst attempting to kill a giant, indestructible flying cockroach and then having to type with it (the finger, not the Palmetto Bug) the rest of the week.

2) The impenetrable armor masquerading as packaging for common household products. Seriously -- wrap that shit around every nuclear reactor on the planet immediately. Just stop encasing my freaking double-A batteries in it.

3) Clients who call you after they send an email to let you know they emailed you. Isn't the whole freaking point of email to avoid direct conversations? Gah!

I'm going to stop now. This could go on all day.

Steven Friedlander, Esq. said...

It sucks that all these things suck.

It sucks to be broke
and unemployed
and turning thirty-three.
It sucks to be me.


I coming to this country
For opportunities.
Tried to work in
Korean deli
But I am Japanese.
But with hard work
I earn two Master's Degrees
In social work!
And now I a therapist!
But I have no clients
And I have an
Unemployed fiance'!
And we have lots
Of bills to pay!
It suck to be me!
It suck to be me!
I say it
It suck to be me!

Dave S. said...

Somehow I forgot to mention seasonal allergies. I was probably too busy sneezing and blowing my nose.

@Betty, you could use the palmetto bug as a splint for your finger. Poetic justice, if a bit wiggly.

J. said...

@Betty, you broke your finger trying to kill a bug? That SUCKS. (I would be totally screwed.) And please, don't stop with just three. :-)

@The Daily Del Franco, yup, those suck. Ditto @Dave S., and @Kendor.

@Steven, it sucks when I don't get a comment. Am I missing something? (Cause you're not 33, nor unemployed, nor Japanese.)

Anonymous said...

-Leaking nuclear plants
-People you stop at the end of escloaters who stop (without taking a step to the left or the right) to look around
-One red shirt in my whites laundry
-Not having a billion in the bank-SUCKS!!
-That Ice cream is not diet food

larissa said...

SO many things suck
Interviews, definitely
Freeloaders, also

Kendor said...

Oops, forgot this one...

4463076">Mean People Suck!

J. said...

@Anonymous, nuclear power plants now fall under "Things That Leak [or Blow]." But I am totally with you re the one red shirt in the white laundry (been there, done that -- hurray for bleach). Re ice cream, three words: Edy's Slow Churn.

@Dave S., see "Things that Blow."

@Kendor, "4463076">"??? Vague numerical references suck.

T said...

immature, irresponsible people...who are supposed to be adults....

J. said...

@T, I totally second that.