Turning tricks for treats

Alternate title: Victoria's Secret: Putting the Ho in Halloween

It (somewhat) saddens me to say that one of the all-time most viewed posts on J-TWO-O is the one titled "You can't spell Halloween without Ho," about the sexification (which, technically, is not a word... yet) of Halloween and, more specifically, Victoria's Secret Halloween costumes.

While I would like to think it was my sparkling writing and wit that made the post so popular, I believe it has more to do with my screen capture of Victoria's Secret Halloween costumes. Indeed, if you Google "Victoria's Secret Halloween" or "Victoria's Secret Halloween costumes" and look under Images on the first page, my image of Victoria's Secret Halloween costumes appears right in the first row, and is ranked higher than anything on the Victoria's Secret site. (Sniff. I am so proud.)

Of course, that image is two years old, a lifetime in fashion. So, as a service to perverts and masochistic women everywhere, I decided to see what Victoria had on offer this Halloween season -- and make a new screen capture. You're welcome, world. [Click on the image to get a larger view. Then use your back button to return to the post.]

Let's see now.... So this year, it appears, Victoria's Secret is honoring our brave men and women in uniform! However, I am not sure if the Sexy Little Sailor and Sexy Little Sargeant outfits (both on sale for only $68... what, not $69?) are military issue, though I am sure they would pass inspection from Major Horndog. (God, I love blogging.)

What else... hmm... ah yes, the Sexy Little Police Officer, which comes with marabou handcuffs. Though why the Sexy Little Mobster doesn't come with a gun ("stick it up," indeed) is beyond me. I am also slightly concerned about the messages Victoria's Secret is sending via their panties. A skull and cross bones? BOO? GIMME YOUR CANDY (printed on the backside)?

Also, the whole Sexy Little French Maid thing? So cliche. (On the other hand, if Maria Shriver had worn that getup around the house, maybe Arnold would not have had sex with the actual maid.) And really, a feather duster? Whatever tickles your fancy.

As for me, I'll probably be wearing my Little Flannel Pajamas Halloween evening, which, I am happy to say, the spouse finds more than a little sexy.