Tuesday, May 5, 2009

American Idol rocks out... Plus: I've been tagged by Mattress Police

Another Tuesday night, another hour wasted (?) watching American Idol. Tonight's theme, as you probably guessed from the title of this post, is rock, though it would have been far more interesting/appropriate if the Idol contestants had to sing Latin songs, in honor of Cinco de Mayo. (Let's just hope that despite not having a "proper run through," the performances are not stinkos de mayo.)

Tonight's guest "mentor," Slash (nee Saul Hudson) from Guns N'Roses.

Rock on, Idol dudes!

First up, Adam Lambert, singing Led Zeppelin:

I know you all got a "Whole Lotta Love" for Adam, and it's about effin' time he officially sang some Zeppelin. Except for J-THREE-O freaking out over Adam's hair, which is kinda weird tonight, I quite enjoyed Adam's performance. In a word: BRILLIANT. (You Adam lovers happy now? Good. But wtf is Kara wearing? Simon gonna walk her after the show?)

Next up, Allison Iraheta singing some Janis Joplin:

OMG. Is Allison channeling Elivra?! Seriously, girl, you got amazing pipes, but lousy taste in hair dressers. Fortunately, she is making me "Cry Baby" tears of joy. Another rocktastic performance. (I have no idea what Randy and Kara were talking about. We're voting for Allison.)

And now, Kris Allen and Danny Gokey... together...

and I've got to say, I'm liking this duet thing, though I've always liked "Renegade." Good song choice for these guys. And I'm with Randy that the harmonies were the bomb. But for the record, I thought Danny did a MUCH better job than Kris, who seemed a bit overwhelmed.

Followed by Kris singing solo...

Okay, who wouldn't be intimidated by Slash playing guitar next to him? But oh... my... God. John Lennon must be rolling over in his grave (or weeping in Heaven). That just didn't "Come Together" for me, and I 100% agree with Kara (eek) and Simon (though I like eating ice) that it was not a good performance. Paging Carly Smithson.

Next: Danny sings "Dream On"...

Will he get the scream? Will he? Will he? Feh. To quote the spouse, "This just isn't working for me." Danny just doesn't have the raw sexuality or vocal chords to bring off the Aerosmith classic. And that scream. Ouch. As J-THREE-O noted, "He's going to have laryngitis in the morning." Yup. NEXT.

And we conclude tonight's American Idol with those two hairy canaries, Adam and Allison, singing Fog Hat's "Slow Ride."

Well, at least their hair is coordinated. Not bad. Not bad, dawgs. In fact, I actually thought they sounded pretty good together. And I agree with Randy, they should record a duet together -- and with Simon that Adam may have just saved Allison. I hope so. (Sorry VB, but Kris has got to go.)

Tomorrow on Idol: Chris Daughtry, No Doubt, and... Paula Abdul. Yesssss.

AMERICAN IDOL UPDATE 5/7/09: As many predicted, the red-headed troll doll (aka Allison Iraheta) is gone. I actually thought, based on everyone's performances last night, that she deserved to stay another week, but Kris has the backing of the powerful cougar lobby and was safe -- and I doubt Danny, despite his bad performance, was going to kicked. (No way Adam was going home after rockin' the Zep.)

And on a personal note... On Monday I was tagged by blogger Rob "Diesel" Kroese on his blog, Mattress Police. Diesel, who in addition to running Mattress Police runs the site Humor Blogs and by day develops software for Google, has commented on J-TWO-O a couple of times, so I proposed a link exchange. But, instead of giving me a permanent link, he tagged me, in his "Retarded Meme" post, his ultimate quest to become the number one retarded site on the Internet. *Sigh.*

I have mixed feelings about the words retarded and retard, as they can and are often used in a derogatory (i.e., mean and/or demeaning) fashion. And we all know it's not nice to make fun of people who have disabilities, or, in PC language, are "challenged." That said, I did laugh when I saw this poster:

Anyway, if I want to get a link on Mattress Police, which, when not being retarded, can be quite funny (and gets a lot of traffic), I need to follow The Rules, which are, and I quote:
1. You must write a post using the word retarded. [Check.] I don't care what it's about -- Joe Biden, teenage boys wearing girls' pants, whatever.
2. The word retarded must be a link to this post. [Check.]
3. You are encouraged to tag five other bloggers -- [that would be you, Betty Cracker, and you, TommyMac, and you, Dave S., and you, Marindenver, and you, Mr. Del Franco] -- to do the same. [Check.]
And with that, I bid you adios amigos.


EMM said...

Most of the men I've met on EHarmony are socially retarded. I don't ever feel bad about saying that.

The poster was hysterical, I am kind of sorry to find that funny (no, wait, it IS funny and I am mean).

Good luck with the linking.

BTW, I have no clue about the AI post. Thanks for making this post a duet.

Diesel said...

I read something recently where somebody compared the word retarded to the word lame. Calling something lame doesn't mean you hate people who can't walk, it just means that you think something is lame. People need to not be so retarded about this things.

Anonymous said...

Idol tonight wasn't awful.

1-Adam rocked in eyeliner.
2-Allison rocked in red hair ickness
3-Kris was okay
4-Danny, ooooh what to say-yikes!

I liked the duets.

The judges are gunning for Kris-come on America-vote Danny off!

Loved the owl photo!

marindenver said...

Anonymous said it all. Adam will now cruise to the finals. I take back what I said about him not really wanting to win. Tonight he got serious about it.

And it's time to re-invent the word retarded to mean behind, out of touch, backwards, clueless and mainly Republican. Or PUMA. Or birfer. In fact nothing to do with developmentally disabled persons who are usually delightful human beings. Inspiration! Look for post!

J. said...

You guys are very funny. : )

I hear you, EMM.

Diesel, SO TRUE. Ditto Marindenver.

And Anonymous, you COUGAR, I think Kris should be kicked, but I bet he won't. ; P

GSA said...

This blog-a-blogger shtick is a whole new world to your retarded ma.

Diesel said...

Oh, and I haven't ruled out a permanent link yet.... Be patient. I'm a busy, busy man. :)