Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Really, what is so hard about bagging a bunch of groceries?

Granted, I have a master's degree (albeit in International Relations, not in Bagging). But seriously, do you really need an advanced degree, or even a college diploma, to figure out how to put a shopping cart's worth of stuff into three canvas bags so that one bag does not weigh 20 pounds more than the others?

Oh, and before you politically correct types start pointing out that a lot of baggers are mentally challenged and don't know any better, let me state for the record that I am not referring to those particular baggers, who often do a better job than the seemingly non-mentally challenged.

Why do I even care (or care enough to blog about bagging)? Because I have a really bad upper back/neck/shoulder problem. (One doctor diagnosed me with early stage cervical arthritis years ago. The same doctor whose response to my months of agony was to tell me to take two Aleve and call him the next week.) And if or when I carry anything too heavy, the pressure on my upper back and neck triggers a migraine, which sidelines me for hours or sometimes days. That's why. So I am extremely careful about the bagging of groceries.

To prevent the dreaded bagging problem, my past strategy was to sweetly tell the baggers at my local Stop & Shop (and other grocery stores I frequent) to distribute the weight between bags (which I brought), because I had a bad back, and even made helpful suggestions. And I swear they would look me straight in the eye, say "sure ma'am!" and then completely ignore me. One time I was so frustrated, I rebagged several items right there at checkout.

More typically, though, I choose lanes without a bagger and tell the checkout person that I will bag my own stuff, which usually elicits a "thank you!" Or I do self checkout. But even self checkout is not so "self" anymore, as I experienced today (and on some other days).

There I was, doing the early morning grocery run, rushing so I could get back to my home office in time to put my purchases away before starting in on my latest project (i.e., work), flinging my stuff through the scanner when a middle-aged male store employee came over and started to bag my stuff. "Thank you!" I sweetly said, quickly tossing him my bags, so I could return to scanning my items. In the process, I failed to mention my equal distribution request. And when I looked up a few seconds later, I saw that he had crammed all the heavy items into one bag and was staring at my third bag, which was empty, until he quickly shoved the last few remaining light items into.

I sighed inwardly, signed the pad, and hurried out, thanking the man as I passed him (while inwardly cursing him). When I got back to my car, about half a block away from prying eyes, I rearranged some of the items in hopes of saving my back some strain, asking myself "Why? Why is it that in a town full of reasonably bright, at least somewhat educated, more or less logical people, NO ONE knows how to strategically bag a bunch of groceries?"

I think the Europeans absolutely have the right idea: bring your own (preferably non-plastic) bags and bag your stuff yourself.

UPDATED 11:25 A.M.: The bad news: My interviewee just bailed on me. AGAIN. Though is supposedly going to call me later. The good news: lots of action this morning on the Puppy Cam!

UPDATED 6:59 P.M.: No headache so far, despite lugging. And I finally managed to nail down all my interviews for my next article -- and wrote another article in between interviews. Yup, pretty darn proud of myself. And all this hard work has earned me another trip to... the Puppy Cam! Gosh, they are cute. Oh, and a big THANK YOU to all the folks who weighed in on bagging (both here and offline). Still plenty of time to leave more comments, folks! Step right up!

18 comments:

Anonymous said...

Well, you know what Fiona Apple says: "I thought it was a bird, but it was just a paper bag."

Anonymous said...

the difficult things
are often the most simple
unless they are hard

Anonymous said...

Here's a blast from the past... now if only John Starks was bagging your groceries, he surely would have evenly distributed your items. After all success in basketball requires those same balancing skills. As you may recall, Starks was a champion bagger before eventually becoming a star for our formerly beloved Knicks.

And of course, Kurt Warner (of the Western Division Leading Arizona Cardinals) was also famously a grocery store guy. And surely he too would have been looking out for your back and neck.

They are clearly hiring the wrong type of people at our local Stop and Shop ;-)

Dave S. said...

I was going to leave a comment here but realized that I actually have a lot to say on this subject, so rather than take up space in this comments thread I will blog this myself as soon as possible.

Dave S. said...

I would like to apologize for the non-comment comment above. Briefly, I suspect there is a conflict of philosophy at work here: J wants equal distribution of weight, while Stop & Shop may group groceries by weight to protect the lighter and presumably more delicate items from the heavier and presumably more sturdy items. Discuss.

Anonymous said...

I have the same problem and it happens just about everytime I visit any of the local Stop and Shops in Wilton and Norwalk!!! (Is is me, or you or both of us?!!) In fact, I rebagged ALL my groceries at my last trip to the Stop and Shop this past weekend. In addition to not balancing the bags, how about putting that big two liter bottle of soda or half gallon of orange juice in the same bag with chips or bread or some other soft and delicate vegatable or fruit? Hello? Does anyone like their chips smashed, bread smushed in on one side or your veggies and fruit completely bruised?!! And here's another one, I usually ask for all the refridgerated and frozen items to be bagged separately so they can be put into freezer bags I bring but it NEVER happens! I find some melted ice cream or mushy cheese stuffed into the bag with the canned beans. BTW, I generally have better luck at Stew's. Then again, there is Costco and there the challenge is to find the right size box! :)

J. said...

Wow, Dave. The new comment is really profound. Though I think you are giving S&S way too much credit as both Anonymous and I have looked on in horror as fruit and/or potato chips have been packed alongside (or under!) big, heavy items.

Love the latest haiku, Larissa. So profound -- and true.

And excellent points i. usedtowork@waldbaums. ; ) If only!

Anonymous said...

Puppy Cam pups at 6 weeks TODAY!!! Happy Birthday you seriously cute pups!

Dave S. said...

I was going to post a followup comment but decided instead to post a comment on a different blog. Ha ha! Just kidding! OW!!!

Having read the followup comments it appears that my point about a philosophical conflict may be moot, as the Wilton Stop & Shop, irrespective of its bagging policy, sounds like it is staffed by dummies.

J. said...

I see a "Bagging for Dummies" book in my future. Thanks Dave.

For the record, though, we do not refer to them as "dummies," Dave. That would be politically incorrect. We refer to them as "organizationally challenged."

Anonymous said...

Some carry their groceries home... others put them in the car. I deliberately put a bunch of heavy, non-crushable items into one bag, so that I can put a light, delicate bag full of loaves of bread and bags of salad on top of it....
AND I live in Europe, where I get to bag my own stuff... so I am totally outside of your data pool. Just to mess you up..

J. said...

I am sure Dave will be thrilled to read you proved his theory, T. Maybe you do need a master's degree to properly/logically bag. Hmmm.

Thanks for the comment. And for the record, my data pool is infinite, so you didn't mess it up. : )

Dave S. said...

Having my theory hold true on two continents is indeed a thrill. Thanks T!

Anonymous said...

Good blog! But I was disturbed to hear about the cascading effect (on you) of lugging home the groceries. Evidently, the guy at the market was a dork. However, compelling Americans to pack their own brought-from-home bags could work. As you say, it works in Paris. But the bags that they distribute, in Monoprix at least, are apt to break under a heavy load. Also, the checkout lines are held up forever when a slow customer has to open and pack the flimsy bags they supply. But each nation to its defects!

Dave S. said...

Muzak* interruption:

"Attention, J, we have a PC evaluation in comment 14. PC evaluation in comment 14. Thank you."

*Don't Stop Believin' on autoharp.

J. said...

Chill, Dave. "Dork" is just French for someone who is bagging challenged. Or did I miss something?

Btw, for the record, Stop & Shop (or my S&S) does not play (shudder) Muzak.

EMM said...

J - this is one of my biggest peeves too, and I love going to the grocery store. A bad check out can ruin the zen of going up and down the aisles.

If needed, I'll redistribute the goods right there, in front of everyone. Is that so wrong?

I've told the cashiers that I don't care about the $.05, please use all the bags I've brought and put on the belt before the goods.

The big T-Day grocery trip is coming up. Get your plan in place!

Anonymous said...

Here in Japan you bag your own groceries. Of course Japan culture is sensible in many other ways too.

-Ted