Sunday, January 11, 2009

The NFL Playoffs Have Gone to the Birds

The Giants SUCKED. The Titans SUCKED. The Panthers SUCKED. The Colts SUCKED. I am DROWNING in my Super Bowl pool. Wasn't it enough, Lord, that the Mets flamed out (again) and lost the division to the Phillies? Have you no sense of justice? Feh. (And I am still upset about the Jets, who appear to be cursed.)

What is about these fine-feathered teams? Don't Panthers kill birds? And shouldn't a Giant be able to shoot down an Eagle, and a Titan a Raven? What's next? Will the Steelers be struck down by lightning (aka the Chargers)?

Oh sure, Philadelphia fans, gloat while you can. Bask in that Brotherly Love. Next week, you are going down.

I am now officially rooting for the Baltimore Ravens and the Arizona Cardinals.

Less than three months 'til opening day of Major League Baseball...

UPDATED 6:26 P.M.:
While I cannot entirely blame the Giants' defeat today on Plaxico Burress, I do blame a portion of it on Mr. Burr-ASS. After the Giants wide receiver shot himself in the leg, the Giants, perhaps in sympathy, repeatedly shot themselves in the foot.


jjv said...

Truly a bad year for NY sports. Will a Manning appear in a super bowl again?

Anonymous said...


larissa said...

Playoffs do go flat
I've seen lots of wasted time
And couches suffer

Dave S. said...

My condolences. Fiona is happy that the Cardinals won, however, as they are her favorite bird.

J. said...

This would be the same child who thought you were Brett Favre (or looked just like him), yes?

Shouldn't her favorite animal be a buffalo? I am seriously starting to question your parenting skills, Dave. Next thing you know she's going to be chasing her brother with a tomahawk or rooting for the Nationals. Oh wait... ; )

Gosh, I sure hope so, JJV. As you know, I was hoping for some Manning a Manning action this Super Bowl.

And so true, Larissa. So true.

EMM said...

I was rooting for the Giants and will now hope for the Ravens to win. The only reason I'll pull for Charm City's team is because continued success will irk Redskins Fans.

I too am looking forward to Baseball...and rooting for the Nationals(and the Red Sox)!!!

Dave S. said...

She is a bit too young to hear the horror story that is Scott Norwood. And anyway, if someone thinks I look like Brett Favre, who am I to correct them?

So J, are you blaming Plax for Manning's floaters? Interesting. Although that throw to Samuel was right on the money...

I'm with EMM on the Ravens for the same exact reason.

creepus said...

Football sucks. It always has. It's one of the stupidest games ever invented. The irony is that the people who play it have to be
intelligent, as well as insane to risk the kinds of injury most of
them inevitably suffer. I often wonder why it's such an attraction.
Maybe it's the violence, combined with the skill and athleticism with which some players thrill us.

I'm glad you're now rooting for Baltimore. I am too. It's my
daughter's home team, though I doubt that she cares. My team
(Patriots) didn't make the playoffs even though they had a better record (11-5) than the Chargers (8-8). Your team (Giants, 12-4), numero uno in their division, just got stunned by a 6th seeded team (Eagles, 9-6-1) as did the Titans (13-3) by the other 6th seeded team (Baltimore, 11-5).

This may be a year of upsets. Let's not speak about justice. It's only a concept. It has nothing to do with outcomes. Not in football at any rate.

I reach out in commiseration. Let's join forces in rooting for a
lesser team that nonetheless made it to the playoffs and may well GO ALL THE WAY in this season of anomalies.

J. said...

No Dave, I am not blaming Eli's "floaters" on Plax's absence. However, I do blame Plax for the bad karma/shift in play and confidence. Definitely a correlation. Eli and Plax had a thing. Eli and the rest of the team had to make an adjustment, with a lot of key players gone. The defense sucked (not Plax's fault) -- and Asante Samuel is a great player. The Eagles had the momentum going into this one, just like the Giants did last year.

Anonymous said...

We had some fun in our household last weekend talking about the "fierceness" of different teams. Cardinals? Come on -- how can a little red bird be fierce? One I just discovered recently and thought was hilarious are the University of Maryland Terrapins. (Fierce turtles?)

Dave S. said...

I have since caught up on my sports reading, and had not realized that the Giants' slide conincides (hmm) with Burress' absence.

Anonymous, I have seen cardinals at our feeder shoo away other birds rather aggressively while they were eating. However, Arizona faces the Eagles and not the English Sparrows next week, so we shall see.

As far as the Terps are concerned, the motto at U-MD is "Fear the Turtle." This is miles ahead of the Williams College Purple Cows, the Amherst Lord Jeffs and the Wellesley We Don't Have Any Teams, and only slightly behind the Hamilton Continentals, whose mascot at least is armed.

I picked those colleges out of a hat - no bias or slant.

J. said...

That is most enlightening, Dave. And as always, I am impressed by your objectivity and lack of bias.

Btw, I also went to University of Chicago, another no-team university. And in another striking coincidence, not only did I attend two places of higher learning that had no teams but I have lived in three dry towns.