Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Two Weeks Notice (George W. Bush Employment Termination Letter)

We the People
Everywhere, USA

January 6, 2009

President George W. Bush
1600 Pennsylvania Ave. NW
Washington, DC 20500

Re: Termination of Employment

Dear President Bush,

This is to inform you that your services to the United States of America are no longer required and that your employment with the United States Government, on behalf of We the People, will be terminated as of January 20, 2009.

This letter serves as two (2) weeks notice of your termination. Given that you are being terminated with cause (incompetence), this notice is being given as a courtesy to you. The statutory law does not require an employer ("We the People") to provide any notice when an employee is terminated for cause. However, despite your incompetence (two wars, "Mission Accomplished," Katrina, etc.), We the People will be providing you with a Federal Pension and Retirement Benefits per the Former Presidents Act.

Please remove your and your family’s belongings from the White House on or before January 20, 2009 – and take Dick Cheney and the rest of your sorry administration and go.

Yours sincerely,

We the People


TommyMac71 said...

Who is going to read it to him?

Edward P. Schwartz said...

Be careful. Given his low IQ and obvious ADHD, he might sue under the ADA.

Dave S. said...

We need to differentiate between intelligence and intellectual curiosity/flexibility. Bush is probably fine on the former but definitely off the bottom of the chart on the latter. An active refusal to use one's brain is almost criminal in my book.

Anonymous said...

You guys are such dirty, uninformed liberals it makes me sick. I hope you get everything you deserve in the next 4 years. Enjoy your drunkin VP and 2d pres with no experience with anything except making apologies for his whore of a mother. ;)

Anonymous said...

We should put in Al Gore. He loves the Earth and could help with climate change. I also hear he invented the internet.

Anonymous said...

Jeez, whats your problem?

Anne Ominous said...

Dear Mr. Obama:

Thank you for your application for a faculty position with the U.S. Federal Government Executive Branch in response to our advertisement. At your earliest convenience, please submit the following documents in support of your candidacy. References and other materials in support of your application must be sent directly to the appropriate department or search committee:

-Validated copy of U.S. Birth Certificate
-Application for Employment
-Official Transcripts
-Professional References
-Personal References
-Resume and Vitae

The U.S.A. is an equal opportunity institution and seeks to fill all positions with the most highly qualified applicants available without discrimination because of race, national origin, religion, gender, age, veteran status, political affiliation, sexual orientation or disability. This letter explains its accompanying ATTACH4: "Applicant Data Form" which you may forward, if you choose, via e-mail to the Office of Affirmative Action affirmact@whitehouse.gov, or you may use the provided postage paid envelope and mail the form to the Office of Affirmative Action, 1600 Pennsylvania Ave NW
Washington, DC 20500

Institutions of government also are required by federal law to advise applicants regarding crime statistics. Your personal safety and the security of the national community are of vital concern to the U.S. Government. The nation's annual security report is available upon request. This report includes statistics for the most recent eight-year period concerning reported crimes that occurred domestically, in certain non-domestic buildings or property owned or controlled by American interests, and on public property within or immediately adjacent to and accessible from the nation. The report also contains information regarding the law enforcement authority of the military; policies concerning homeland security, such as crime prevention, alcohol and drug use, sexual assault and the reporting of any crimes which may occur on the property. You can obtain a copy of this report by contacting the Office of Public Safety, Crime Prevention Unit, 1600 Pennsylvania Ave NW Washington, DC 20500


John Q. Public

J. said...

To all those reading this,

Thank you for taking the time to read this post. And to those who disagree or do not approve, please remember or note: This post, like many of my other posts, was meant as satire, which I think is quite evident. However, I do not believe that some of the Anonymous comments were meant that way -- and are inappropriate. However, I am a strong believer in the right to free speech, and as long as comments do not spew hatred or contain foul language, I will continue to post them.

Re Anonymous comments in general, I dislike them and think them cowardly. If you do not have your own blog or website, at least be courageous enough to comment using your first name.

Dave S. said...

Nice cut and paste there, Anne. However, you neglected to provide a point.

Having considered the issue further, Bush's termination of employment is in fact a result of the 22nd Amendment and is, therefore, entirely routine. Termination for cause would have taken the form of impeachment, which in Bush's case probably would have been justified, and had a President Gore done the same things, he rightly would have been impeached and removed from office. This, of course, assumes that "having crappy lawyers employing BS legal reasoning" is not a valid defense; I defer to the officers of the courts on that one.