You might be a Republican if... you think facts were invented by liberals.
You might be a Republican if... you don't believe in global warning (or climate change), or that it has nothing to do with people. (See "You might be a Republican if... you think facts were invented by liberals" and "you get your news from Fox.")
You might be a Republican if... you think evolution is just another liberal theory.
You might be a Republican if... you don't what Liberalism actually means -- and don't care.
You might be a Republican if... you are against people receiving government entitlements (Social Security, Medicaid, Medicare, farm subsidies, corporate tax breaks, student loans, government loans), except if it's you, your family, or your business receiving them.
You might be a Republican if... you complain about taxes in one breath and complain about the poor quality of your schools, police force, roads, and bridges in the next.
You might be a Republican if... you are "pro life," except for those who can't pay their medical bills and pregnant women.
You might be a Republican if... you think women, blacks, and/or Hispanics should "know their place" (that is, at home taking care of the kids and having your supper and a drink ready when you get home from work; helping your sports team win a championship or else in jail; taking care of your lawn for minimum wage, respectively).
You might be a Republican if... you think cheating is wrong, unless your wife has her period or you're out of town on business.
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