A tempest in a D-Cup?

Maybe it's because I am a lifelong member of the Itty Bitty Titty Committee (except, perhaps, when I was nursing), but I never realized what a huge problem finding a good bra -- or a good-fitting bra -- was. (Though try finding a 30B bra anywhere other than the Girls department. Trust me, you can't.)

Have you ever walked into the Ladies Lingerie or Intimate Apparel department in a department store? There are literally THOUSANDS OF BRAS, in practically every shape, style, and color (except for a 30B in nude or really any solid color). It makes me envy women with a 36C (which is apparently the preferred method of stuffing a wild bikini*).

And yet according to bra maker Wacoal (which makes one of my favorite bras), 90 million women are wearing the wrong bra. Huh?

The problem, per Wacoal and other boobologists**, a too big band and too small cups. (Which, technically, I am also guilty of -- though it's not my fault!)

But now apparently, Jockey is riding to the rescue, creating a new measurement system and line of bras designed to provide women -- with all the way up to a 50N*** -- a better fit.

To which I say, Oy. Do we women really need to deal with yet another measurement system?

Granted, the current system for figuring out one's bra size -- measuring your chest at the widest point; then measuring the rib cage, just below the breasts; with the rib cage measurement being the band size and the difference between the two measurements determining the cup size, with a one-inch difference means an A; a two-inch difference means a B; and so on -- isn't perfect. And no, it's not because women aren't good at math. It's because breasts come in different shapes and most women don't like feeling corseted.

But instead of coming up with a whole new system, or one manufacturer wreaking havoc by coming up with a new system, couldn't all you bra manufacturers just get together and decide on a single set of standards? (Ditto all you women's clothing and shoe manufacturers.)

Men's clothing, including underwear, and shoes are pretty much standardized. So why can't women's clothing and shoe and bra designers do it? (I know, I know: vanity sizing. Women have gotten much bigger, all over, but don't want to buy larger sizes.)

If you ask me, this is a tempest in a D-Cup.

*I miss Beach Party Week and The 4:30 Movie.
**Not a real word.
***OMG, 50N?!

Is honesty always the best policy?

One of the things that hurts me most as a parent is when my daughter lies to me. Since she was a toddler, I have told her that honesty is the best policy -- and that it was better to tell me something, the truth, even if it meant I might get mad a her, than for me to find out she had lied to me. That would make me even angrier, I told her.

But over the years I have wondered, is honesty really the best policy? Or always the best policy?

Don't get me wrong. I think it's important to tell the truth. Most of the time. But what if you knew the truth would hurt someone? Should you lie or not say anything, even when the person is practically begging you for the truth?

I remember years ago, during a particularly dark period in my life when I was in therapy, I was consumed with guilt over something I knew about someone and wanted to reveal what I knew, because I hated lying. And my therapist -- a licensed psychologist -- told me not to. Why hurt someone, she said, if you didn't have to?

I was shocked. I still am, a bit, years later. But I never told -- and was glad I didn't.

Recently, I was confronted with another situation that made me question the whole "honesty is the best policy" policy.

What if you know something about someone else's child that the parent doesn't know? I'm not talking about the kid doing drugs or committing a crime. But what if you knew a friend's kid was on Facebook, even though he didn't have permission to be on Facebook? Or your friend didn't know her daughter was fooling around with a boy behind her back? Or driving her friends around when she wasn't supposed to (which, technically, is illegal)? Would you tell your friend or keep your mouth shut?

What if you saw your best friend's husband (or wife) with another woman (or man)? Would you tell your friend, even if she or he asked if you thought her or his spouse was having an affair?

I know there are no easy answers to these questions, but I'd be interested to hear what you all think. Is honesty always the best policy? And if not, what do you tell your kids? First do no harm?

Caption these two cat photos

I recently took these two photos of our cats, Felix and Flora. And I thought it would be fun to see what captions you guys could come up with, so many of you being either a) cat people, b) wordsmiths, or c) all of the above.

The first photo is of our cat, Felix, taken shortly after he jumped into our glassware cabinet (as I was about to put away some glasses.)

Any caption suggestions?

Next up, our cat Flora, who was (patiently? pissed off?) waiting for me by the front door as I went to get the mail the other day.

Leave your captions in the Comments section. I will let you know my favorites this coming week.

Because a vagina is a terrible thing to waste

So when I opened NYTimes.com this morning, what should I see at the top of the page, right there in the middle, but the great big headline "Unexcited? There May Be a Pill for That!" about a new drug called Lybrido that purports to help women suffering from HSDD (Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder), aka a low sex drive.

My first reaction? Lybrido? Seriously? Did George Jetson's dog Astro name this thing? ("Jane doesn't want to have sex with George anymore? Ruh-roh. Rust be something wrong with her lybrido!")

My next reaction, Sure, announce this after Saturday Night Live goes on summer break.

And finally, so when did a woman not wanting to have sex several times a week with her husband -- the guy she's been married to for a billion years, who is rarely at home, who doesn't understand what it's like to deal with three hormonal teenagers, who never asks her how she's doing, and plays golf with his buddies on the weekend* -- become a disease that needed to be treated? Puh-lease. If that was the case, almost every woman in my County would be required to take Lybrido.

Joking aside, though, I get that there are women out there who can't get it up psychologically and would welcome a pill that makes you horny. (Usually a glass of Champagne and some oysters do it for me, or a good pastrami and turkey sandwich on rye, but I'm easy.)

Me, I'm waiting for scientists to develop a pill that stops people from acting like jerks. (Just think of the name possibilities!)

*Any resemblance to actual persons living or dead is purely coincidental.

Make way for goslings

So as I was driving home from the farmers market this morning, I came across this mama goose and her mate and their three goslings crossing Route 7, our local highway (for lack of a better term). For once, I had my little Canon PowerShot S95 with me, so I was able to take these three photographs.

Here they are in the process of crossing the road. (The goslings were so adorable, waddling away.)

Right after I took this next photo, though, the geese abruptly did an about face (or goose) -- and had me worried for a minute.

Fortunately, there was a red light up ahead -- so no one was honking (except maybe the geese). And by the time light had turned green, mama goose, the gander, and their three goslings had safely waddled over to the shoulder.

And they all lived happily ever after.

What would Spock drink?

[Alternate title: To boldly go where no beer has gone before!]

Finally, someone has managed to combine two of my favorite things: Star Trek and beer! Just in time for the opening of Star Trek into Darkness!

Introducing Vulcan Ale, the first “officially licensed alcoholic beverage” of Star Trek -- and "A logical choice for a palate pleasing libation."

Though I'm not sure a Vulcan ale should be Irish Red. (A pale ale would surely be more logical. Also, I thought Vulcan was known for its port not ale.)

More about Vulcan Ale here and here.

(Though why Vulcan Ale is only sold in Canada seems highly illogical.)

Cat got your door?

(Alternate title: Open says me-ow)

WARNING: Whatever you do, people, do NOT watch these videos in front of your cat(s)!

While we've been at work, our cats have been busy... practicing. And soon, there will be no stopping these felonious felines from entering our bedrooms and waking us up at 5 a.m....



or letting in the dog...



or stealing our food...



Who needs opposable thumbs? Be afraid, humans. Be very afraid.