Dirty Dancing with the Stars?

At last, the cast of Dancing with the Has-Beens -- I mean Stars -- Season 11 has been revealed (soon to be reviled)! And I know you all will be as thrilled as I was to learn that Jennifer Grey, aka Frances "Baby" Houseman, would be among this season's cast members (even though I have never seen Dirty Dancing).

And as we all know, no one puts Baby in the corner. Not even Dancing with the Stars.

Could this be a glimpse of things to come?



If so, I pity poor Derek Hough (who I heard was to be her dancing partner).

Other "stars" who will be cha-cha-ing, waltzing, and jiving on this season's DWTS are Bristol Palin (note to DWTS producers: Being a single teenage mom does not make you a "star," far from it), former Knight Rider and Baywatch "star" David Hasselhoff, crooner Michael Bolton, and semi-professional tanning artist Michael “The Situation” Sorrentino from the Jersey Shore.








I am not a fan of Dancing with the Stars, but I may have to check out a few episodes this season, just to see if Jennifer Grey still has it.

Talking Cats

Sometimes I think Al Gore invented the Internet just so people had someplace where they could share their videos of talking cats.

Btw, even if you are not into cats, talking or otherwise, these two videos are pretty darn funny.

First up, "Kitty is a very BAD Mystic":



(This video had me and my friend, Larissa, cracking up for days. Yes, we are easily amused.)

Next: "Talking Cat (Wake Up Kitty 2)" (which is not to be confused with "Talking Cat (Wake up Kitty 3") or "Talking Cat (Wake Up Kitty 4)"), which my friend, VB, sent me, and which brought a tear to my eye as it reminded me of my dearly departed black cat Sylvester.



Btw, talking dogs? Totally not funny. Just look on YouTube.

Forget Paris

So much for running for President, or cleaning up her act and being a good role model for girls, like she told Larry King just after she was released from jail three summers ago. (Click the first link to see Hilton's 2008 campaign ad, the second link to read the transcript of King's interview with Paris Hilton, her first after being released from jail for repeated DUI.)

Or maybe Hilton thought that what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas -- and out of jail.

In any case, in case you hadn't yet heard, Paris Hilton was arrested in Sin City on charges of cocaine possession late last night -- this after cops stopped the car she was in after seeing marijuana smoke coming from it. (Hey, maybe it was medicinal marijuana, like the kind those cancer patients she told Larry King she wanted to help smoke!)

To top it off, this was the second time this summer that the 29-year-old Hilton heiress was arrested on drug charges (that we know of). The last time being during the World Cup matches in South Africa.

In the words of Elvis Costello: I used to be disgusted, now I try to be amused.

In any case, I am dedicating this Eric Clapton song to you, Paris Hilton. But just remember, as Clapton sings:

If your thing is gone
And you wanna ride on
Cocaine
Don't forget this fact
You can't get it back
Cocaine



Here's hoping that one day -- soon -- Paris uses her celebrity and millions to actually do some good in this world.

UPDATED 8/30/10: "Paris Hilton charged with felony drug possession," but charge may be hard to prove as Paris claims the purse -- and the vial of cocaine inside -- wasn't hers.Uh huh.

Keep your shirt on

Apparently this past Sunday, August 22, was National Go Topless Day. And all around this great nation of ours, in cities like New York (pictured at right), Miami, Chicago, and Venice, California, hundreds of buxom babes proclaimed their constitutional right to bare chests as well as arms in public places, just as men do, by marching around without their shirts. (Wonder if anyone blew his/her top...)

An intrepid CNN iReporter happened to be on the scene at the Annual Venice Beach Topless Day event, which was attended by over 200 bra-less babes and about 50 men. (Really, only 50 men?) Per the CNN Go Topless Day report (which includes some great creatively edited video), "a few Christian men gathered to protest against the women's display of indecency," too. (No doubt shaking their Sports Illustrated Swimsuit issues at the women in disgust.)

And, of course, the New York Daily News was on the scene in New York's Central Park to cover the uncovered. (As per usual, the Daily News' headline, and story, "Topless women march in Central Park for right to bare breasts," did not disappoint.)

Me? I say, Keep your shirts on, ladies, at least in public, except on officially designated topless public beaches -- or ta ta to bearing one's ta-tas in public. (Yeah, yeah, I know: I am such a prude.)

Best horse race EVER

You just can't make this stuff up.

This Sunday at Monmouth Park the seventh race featured a horse named Mywifenosevrything (My Wife Knows -- or "Nos," as in says "no" to --Everything), #3 (which happens to be my lucky number) as well as a horse named Thewifedoesntknow (The Wife Doesn't Know), #7. (Note to self: Look up who owns those horses.)

And as luck would have it, it was Mywifenosevrything battling Thewifedoesntknow down the stretch, which made for some memorable announcing.

Cats do not want you to be productive

Cats just want you to feed them and pet them and provide them with mice and other toys to play with. They do not like when you play with other humans or talk to them on the phone or do work when there are far more important things to do, like playing and talking with them.

Don't believe me? I give you Exhibit A:














(Don't let that those innocent "Who me?" looks fool you. Those cats know perfectly well what they are doing, and it's downright anti-capitalistic, I say.)

Need more proof that cats do not want their humans to be productive? I give you Exhibit B.

Truly, it is amazing I get any work done. (Yeah, yeah, save the wisecracks. I can hear what you are thinking.) Btw, as I've been typing this, Flora, the cat pictured at left, has been in my face, sitting directly in front of me and pawing me as I type.

And if dealing with 15 pounds of feisty feline weren't bad enough, Felix (the black cat pictured above right) has taken a real shine to my shiny new Sony VIAO laptop, particularly the fan. Every opportunity he gets, Felix curls up on top of the computer, inevitably causing the keyboard to lock up. Nice.

But still, I love my cats, and find it sweet that they want to keep me company and do things with me (unlike certain adolescent females I can think of), which is why I am very gentle when throwing them off my desk or out of my office.

Space... the final frontier

On this day, August 20, 33 years ago (or 1977 for those of you who have trouble with subtraction), NASA launched Voyager 2. Its continuing mission: to explore strange new worlds, to seek out new life and new civilizations, to boldly go where no spacecraft has gone before.

And while Voyager 2 has yet to find new life or new civilizations (at least as far as we know), it has found a lot of other really stellar stuff (including rings around Jupiter and new moons around Uranus*) over the course of its 21 billion kilometer voyage. And it has sent back some out of this world pictures, like this one of Saturn and its moons (Dione front; Tethys; Mimas right; Enceladus; Rhea left; and Titan distant top**).

















*Please feel free to share your "moon" and "Uranus" jokes in the comments. I have not had any coffee yet and am not feeling particularly witty or creative.

**To see more Voyager photos, check out the Voyager Images gallery on the NASA JPL site.