69 TOPLES(S)

Saw this license plate earlier today. Am hoping it, "69TOPLES" (aka 69 TOPLESS), referred to this guy's car, a 1969 Plymouth Barracuda Convertible (which is apparently quite rare). But you never know.

Old Spice Guy vs. Fabio vs. Darth Vader iPhone repair

Tired of hearing about the debt ceiling? Depressed by politics as usual? Work? All those back-to-school ads in July? Here are some things to make you smile again.

First up, Isaiah Mustafa (aka The Old Spice Guy) goes Mano a Mano against "Italian model" Fabio (Lanzoni) to see who will be the next Old Spice spokesmodel.





Part of me is tempted to vote for Fabio, who is, like, 55? 60? now. (That must be some portrait he has in his attic.) But my armpits belong to Isaiah Mustafa.

Also worth a viewing, this brilliant (albeit slightly warped) video from comedian Mark Malkoff to determine exactly how far the Apple Store's customer service (or hospitality) extends. FYI, the segment titled "Darth Vader iPhone Repair," at 2:02, is hands-down my favorite.



Finally, getting back to our political crisis du jour, here's yet another reason Republicans need to vote on raising the debt ceiling:

And Goodell said, "Let there be football." And there was football.

And Goodell saw the NFL Collective Bargaining Agreement, and it was good: and Goodell united the players and the owners.

And Goodell saw every thing that they had made, and, behold, it was very good.

And the evening of September 8 and the afternoon of September 11 were the first and second day of football season.

Amen.

I am so ready for some football.

Hope the Jets and Giants don't suck this season.

How to pack for camp like a teenage girl

Yesterday, the spouse and I took our now teenage daughter to her sleepaway program, which runs for three weeks. And this year, for the first time, I had my daughter pack herself (armed with the packing list from camp). And let me just say, I'm pretty sure my daughter would give Ginger and the Howells, from Gilligan's Island, pretty stiff competition in the packing department. (I read the student manual, and I am pretty sure it did not say "Bring everything you own." Also, do you really need six 8-inch bottles of perfume... at camp? Or eyeshadow? I know: "Clearly, J., you are not a 13-year-old girl." To which I say, "Thank goodness!")

Now granted, this post is coming from someone who has been known to bring only a carry-on bag for a week's trip -- or who can cram clothes enough for two people for two weeks in a single regulation suitcase. But I am not a 13-year-old girl, and when I was approximately her age we all went to sleepaway camp (albeit for eight weeks, not three) with rather large trunks. Still.

So somehow the spouse manages to fit our daughter's suitcase, which could sleep a family of three (I exaggerate only slightly), her laundry basket (which is crammed with stuff, including a fan -- a total necessity as there is no air conditioning -- laundry detergent, her rain boots, a small desk lamp, and a blanket -- again, all necessities), her backpack (crammed with stuffed animals), her beach bag (not sure what was in there -- but I think a neutron star may be missing some of its mass), her small trunk (again, no idea what was in there -- but I checked and both cats are present and accounted for), and the three of us into his Honda Civic Hybrid, and we motor to camp. (FYI to all you hybrid car owners, if you want to see what crappy mileage you can get, try taking your daughter to camp or college.)

When we arrive at camp, it takes all three of us to transport her stuff to the unloading area where a U-Haul truck will take everything to her living quarters -- and then all three of us will need to haul it across the courtyard and up a flight of stairs (or in the teeny tiny elevator) and down the hall to her room. In 90-degree weather.

And then I see him. This 13- or 14- year-old boy -- or rather his luggage. Which consists of one average-size suitcase and a carry-on-size rollerboard, both of which he is wheeling himself. And then I spot another boy, with just a suitcase and a backpack. And another one. And as I glance around the unloading area, I realize that our daughter has a lock on the award for most stuff. Indeed, no one is even close. I am so proud.

Harry Potter: Everything You Need to Know in Just 6 Minutes

The final Harry Potter film, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part 2, opened today. And for those of you who are unfamiliar with the terms Hogwarts, quidditch, muggle, and horcrux, the helpful folks over at Slate V put together this amusing video Cliff Notes version of the previous seven films, which is must viewing.



So today's question: Are you planning on seeing Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part 2? And, if so, will a child be accompanying you?

FWIW, I read all seven books, as soon as they came out, but I only saw the first film. My daughter, however, has seen all seven films and is looking forward to seeing the final Harry Potter film while at sleepaway camp later this month.

Cats: three things you didn't know

1. Cats can sing -- or trololo (though apparently only when pet in a certain way)...



[A tip o' the paw to Dave S. and his lovely spouse for this one.]

2. Cats are fearless and brave -- and know how to pack some serious heat...



[More interesting, or definitely more amusing, is the Behind the Scenes - Medal of Honor Cat clip. Btw, some of the YouTube comments on both are pretty darn funny.]

3. Cats have an on-off button...



Who knew?

Is your spouse a dishwasher Nazi?

Per the spouse, I am a dishwasher Nazi, meaning I have a very specific idea of how our dishwasher should be loaded (which I refer to as "common sense, so you can fit the most stuff into it to conserve energy" or "a place for everything, and everything in its place") and get annoyed when other people just randomly jam dishes and bowls and glasses wherever they please. And I am not alone. Indeed, the spouse and I, through years of observation, have come to the (unscientific) conclusion that in most households with more than one person, one of them is a dishwasher Nazi.

For the record, unlike real Nazis, I have never tortured or gassed anyone for putting a plate or bowl in the wrong slot, though I have been known to sigh and cast dirty looks. (Though seriously people, how hard is it to figure out where that plate should go?! Come on!)

Interestingly, in the several other cases of dishwasher domination we know about, it is the man who is in charge (by choice) of loading the dishwasher -- and woe to the spouse or child who attempts to place a plate or glass without his permission, or puts that fork or knife in the wrong side up. (Speaking of forks and knives, we no longer have this issue as our dishwasher has a silverware tray, but do you believe the sharp end should go up or down?)

So, my question to all of you is: Is there a dishwasher Nazi in your household? And, if so, which one of you is it?

[Btw, I just Googled the term "dishwasher nazi" and there are 714,000 results. Clearly, this is a bigger problem than I suspected.]