Signs you might be old

At what point does someone become "old"? Is "old" a number? A feeling? Does being a grandparent make you "old"? I remember as a kid thinking 16 was old -- and then that 21 and 25 were old. Ah, those were the days. 

I do not have a definitive answer to the question, When does one become 'old'? but here are 15 signs you may no longer be a spring chicken....

1. You say things like "no longer a spring chicken" and "Kids these days!" and "Can you read the menu?" and "What did you say?" regularly. 

2. The local "Oldies" station plays the music you grew up listening to.

3. You think gray hair looks distinguished.

4. Something (your knees, your back, your hip, your neck) always hurts.

5. Everyone you know has something that hurts.

6. You go out to dinner (or brunch) with friends and everyone is discussing what hurts (or who died).

7. You wonder where that extra flap of skin beneath your chin and/or that nose and ear hair came from.

8. You own at least two pairs of glasses -- and are constantly misplacing at least one pair (along with your keys). 

9. You write sh*t down, so you won't forget, and you still forget it (or you forget your list).

10. You drive a Buick... or a Lincoln... or a Cadillac.

11. You drive a Buick... or a Lincoln... or a Cadillac wearing a golfing cap (or tennis visor). 

12. You have AARP magazine in your bathroom.

13. You eat dinner before 6. 

14. You spend the winter in Florida (or would like to).

15. You eat dinner before 6 in Florida.